Chapter 21. Brotherly love

Sometimes men might do things that seem completely ill intentioned to a woman and totally innocent and logical to them.

Imagine being a nice British girl from London proper and planning a vacation on a boat with your boyfriend, his five friends and their girlfriends. You might not like the idea at first. After all, you and you boyfriends´girlfriends don’t call each other sisters (according to Oscar Wilde, a woman has to call another woman many things before she calls her a sister) and your boyfriend’s friends are not your cup of tea either. There have been way too many the nights where you have been late for things that you had planned for the two of you just because they were having paints together at the pub after work.

Now imagine that after careful consideration, you decide to put together the vacation plan and you are off to a beautiful island with your boyfriend, his friends and your boyfriends´friends girlfriends. Not a bad plan considering that the boat belongs to one of the boys and that you and your sweetheart will be sailing the coast of Italy and France for almost two weeks.

Now imagine that your boyfriend spends most if the time getting drunk with his friends and disappearing to go meet and have fun with other women. Older women, foreign women, French women! As far as they were concerned, there were only Parisians on our boat.

Now imagine that your host, the owner of the boat, who is the only one single, invites those ladies from their boat over to his for drinks. Not only you had to go through the embarrassment of having to take your boyfriend out of another boat, now you have to put up with the presence of those other women on yours.

By the time the drama scene had happened Fifi and Flo had something special going on. No wonder why he thought that inviting us all over to his magnificent yacht was a good idea. Given the general mood I had my doubts, but since none of us had ever been invited to a boat like that before, we went. We had not had time to try the rooftop jacuzzi when we started hearing people fighting and shouting on the deck below. Minutes later, a member of there crew politely invited us to leave the boat.

“For your safety, madam, I have been requested to ask you to leave at once”.

The next morning, by the time we were waking up, their boat was gone. Hours later Fifi sent Flo a picture of himself with a broken arm saying that he had spent the night at the emergency room.

What did these guys have in mind when they thought that behaving the way that they did was a good idea? I ask myself. What had happened on the boat later on that evening? Probably it was very simple.  For men, in their mind, it was a matter of getting Fifi hooked up with a girl that evening and having some fun along the way. Then I assume some hurtful things about their respective girls were said, some other issues came up and they ended up getting on a fight. After all, Phillip was the owner of the boat and opposite to what the girlfriends might have felt, he could invite over whomever he wanted.

Younger guys (and some men also) feel like in such circumstances when your host and friend is the only single person, they need to help him get some. Their brotherly love towards one another is stronger than their romantic love at that point. That is why fraternities exists and a big part of what they teach. The problem is that guys fail to communicate their intentions to women because they assume that women would never understand the reason behind their actions, which is false. As a result of this assumption, they end up doing something really stupid that actually makes a women mad. Like hidding inside a bar and not picking up their phones when you are supposed to meet with them.

It is quite hideous.


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