Chapter 56. Your face when your cleaning lady brings you clothes that don’t belong to you

Some women do odd things when they go through a divorce. Some hire the best lawyer in town to get the most out of their broken marriage, some seclude themselves at home with the kids feeling sorry for themselves, spending countless hours on the phone telling their friends about their ex´s latest moves and looking at old photo albums.

I wrote.

Since thousands of women have gone through this moment what better thing than to document the sleepless nights, the anxiety and the sad, really sad feelings that go through our veins when a love story ends? Because a failed love story began one day when the hopes were high and the butterflies ran free inside our stomachs, when the person that you meet in front of a judge today was the one taking you to cloud nine.

Crocodile and I had those moments. He literally turn my world upside down, made me forget about my former life. He was so kind, so loving and so attentive that nothing else mattered.

One day, without prior notice, he changed. He began to act like I was no longer the center of his universe and that put a crack in my heart, a crack that ended up at a family court house. A crack that became bigger and bigger and caused me to suffer from insomnia, to loose a lot of weight, to feel increasingly sad, to forget or not care about important events, friends. The crack took over my peace, controlled my temper and pushed me into a depressive episode.

Women endure many things for love. Many lies, many disappointments and even many insults that would have seemed impossible when you first met.

Crocodile wanted to fly solo. He had filed for bankruptcy and needed to sell the house. He acted like a bitter man most of the time.

I left and filed for divorce. Who wants to force someone to love them back?

Because we are women and because we are mothers, we find the strengh to remove the bullets, clean the wounds, put lipstick on, and stand up.

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